This very special recording from 7 Oct 2014 is a conversation between Patrick, JP, and Christine. It’s too large to upload here so I’ve posted it on YouTube instead.
Christine: From your point of view as an 80-year-old man, and your son being 58 years old, and having lived the life that you’ve lived, what advice would you offer him as a younger man?
Patrick: Can you give me a couple days?
Christine: A couple of days… Sure!
JP: Is that how long it will take to describe or to ….
Patrick: To come up with something to say!
Patrick: My advice would be: nothing is more important than love, but not just love in the abstract… loving a person, one at a time.
Christine: Wow. That’s awesome.
Patrick: Is that okay? Are you satisfied with that?
Christine: Well, it’s not about my satisfaction but I happen to agree with you.
Patrick: That’s good…. I love for people to agree with me!
Christine: Even for my own… I would take that advice for myself.
Patrick: It’s the most important thing.
Christine: I think so.
Patrick: It’s the most important thing, but not love in the abstract, love in the “Christian” sense or in the sense that everyone has a value,
Christine: But I think that’s important as well.
Patrick: But that’s a byproduct of being able to love one person and start with yourself. I fyou can’t love yourself you can’t love anyone else.
Christine: And John, you?
Patrick: She wants you to tell me what you think at my age?!
Christine: Not what he thinks of you!
Patrick: What, advice to me?
Christine: No, not advice…. What are some of the appreciations, the most profound appreciation you have for your dad that you’ve acquired in these years of having him involved?
JP: Certainly your [Patrick’s] candor in documenting the history, in describing what has happened over the years, the things that have been important to you in life, being willing to have the spirited conversations, like in 1986 the discussion about plastic shoes and the direction of the world. Your passion for music and most importantly watching you and Stephanie together all those years. That’s a nice role model to have.
John and Willie were wonderful examples for me to have. Seeing you and Stephanie together was the same thing yet radically different, but both in a very, very positive way.
Patrick: Sum it up in one sentence.
JP: In one sentence….
Patrick: I love you.
JP: That’s it.
Christine: awwww. Oh, wow, what an awesome way to end this interview.
Patrick: But you didn’t say it.
JP: I love you, pop.
Christine: But you said it, so it’s equally valuable.
JP: As we’ve already indicated, it’s hard for us express that.
Patrick: Yeah, I know.
Christine: One final thought I’d like to share with you, the day that you told him… I don’t know if it was the first time you told him you loved him, but it was probably other than tonight…
JP: It was two weeks ago, when we were on the phone. [A three-way call.]
Patrick: Yeah, I remember that.
Christine: It was so … it was amazing. It was amazing to me hear that.
Patrick: But the words are not necessarily the expression.
JP: It’s the actions:. The King’s Point motto: acta non verba: deeds, not words.
Patrick: We try… we always tried… I always tried, and I think you always tried, when we met each other over the years, we tried…
Patrick: I remember carrying you in a laundry bag into my apartment in New York because we weren’t permitted to have children in the apartment, so we had to carry you in a laundry bag, and we had a good time, but I think you knew that the reason I had you there was because I loved you. Otherwise I would have said “Why the hell are you here?”
Christine: You know what, in spite of what we perceive and another person understands, hearing those words, there can be no replacement for them. You’re right, actions are … so much more important, but to hear those words as well.
Patrick: Yeah, there’s something about it.
Christine, Patrick, JP: Cheers!
Patrick: What are you doing, what are you doing, what’r you doing, water you’re doing?! I’m doing wine! Water you doing?!
Christine: I’ve finished a glass of wine and I’m on my third glass of water….
JP: And the restroom is that-a-way!